Category: This week…

I have discovered in my new role as carer, that life can be extremely busy but also incredibly monotonous, meds, personal care, meals punctuate the day whilst medical admin, requesting prescriptions, chasing up referrals, equipment etc. can all be quite time consuming too. Add work, which thanks to my employers has been adapted to teaching in the mornings only and then prep at home in the afternoons, mum duties and daily life and you can see why I can only deal with one day at a time. 

This week, I’ve been trying to find small pleasures to lighten the days. I treated myself thanks to some gift vouchers to a Neom diffuser and the smell certainly lifts my spirit. I’ve also finally bought two frames for prints I received for my 50th in the summer and arranged them in their new places, my Limited edition 1973 picture is on my desk, whilst the beautiful Old Friends tree print is now hanging on the wall. These are jobs which didn’t take lots of time, but feel like I’ve really achieved something. This sense of finishing a job is great in this time of uncertainty. I’ve done little jobs around the house, labelling the tv gadgets which keep on getting mixed up and driving me nuts and choosing a few new recipes to try. When I was in town picking up a prescription, I noticed the Oxfam bookshop was closing for refurbishment and picked up two Delia cookbooks for £1 each. I have also been trying to plan my wardrobe for our big summer holiday and have started using the Style book app. At present I am uploading photos of current clothes and thinking on the looks I would like to wear en vacances. My final job of the weekend was a walk with my son as I try to give each child 1:1 time at the weekend, even if its simply for an hour or so. On our walk, we went to the pier and cleaned my birthday plaque, again a quick job but one which brought great pleasure, of course the trip finished with tea and cake. 

Its difficult to write on what has been a truly life affecting event. Life has been put on hold for the past few weeks as we are all dealing with the effect of an accident for Mr S.

This year, we were exceptionally well prepared for Christmas as Mr S was due to have a planned operation on December 12th. As he would be recovering for a few weeks after, all presents were bought and wrapped and we had done some lovely festive family treats in the weeks preceding, ready to hibernate for a cosy, quiet Christmas. I am so relieved we did this as after 13th December, time stopped and the only reason we had a Christmas was due to our forward planning and preparation. 

Mr S operation went well on the Tuesday and he was discharged from the day surgery and came home to recover. He seemed really well and I went to work as normal the next day, simply doing a shorter day. When I came home, he had a shower, ate dinner and we were pottering around the kitchen when he suddenly fainted, quickly and suddenly without warning. He hit his head with such a force that one side of his face was bleeding badly and he was unconscious. Our son ran for help, whilst I called 999. In the best stroke of luck, our local lifeboat crew were receiving emergency medical training and we quickly had paramedics, first responders, the air ambulance crew and an A&E consultant, the latter three from the training a few minutes from our house. It quickly became clear that this was serious and as soon as he was stabilised. he was taken to a local hospital. By the time I arrived at the hospital, having organised for my son to be looked after by our neighbours and an overnight bag hastily packed, a CT scan had been carried out and I was told that they were liaising with the regional neuro unit for him to be transferred due to a bleed on the brain. This was the scariest night of my life, trying to keep him talking so he did not sleep which might have been fatal whilst many doctors and nurses worked on him. When he was transferred, it was with an ICU doctor in the ambulance and I was not allowed to accompany him. I was asked to wait for a call to be able to visit him as the neuro unit was under extreme pressure on that night. So in the first of many surreal moments, I came home for 6am, picked up my son and got him ready for school, did a few jobs all in a complete daze. My parents came over with my daughter and we simply waited until we could go over to Southampton. I did try to sleep as it had been 28 hours without sleep but that didn’t really happen.

My mum and I went over to Southampton in the afternoon and started what would become our daily routine for the next 10 days. I knew how poorly Mr S was and how his facial injuries and potential speech and memory problems might frighten the children, so felt it best to keep them safe at home. I quickly discovered that time is a strange measure in hospitals, I was allowed in 2 – 8pm daily and with travelling times, was out 12 – 10pm daily. My day started a routine, the morning with the children, tidy up, organise dinner and then leave to be with Mr S. Amazing friends rallied round to help support with the children, taking them out to give my parents a break. The gingerbread biscuits in the photo were a most welcome late night snack baked by the children with a friend. I started daily updates to keep everyone informed but for most of the time there was little news, we simply went from hour to hour. What had been an improvement on one day, could quickly be reversed the next day. Sometimes Mr S would talk, on other visits he slept for our time together. Breaks away from the bed were down to the café for a drink and snack. On two nights I was moved to tears in the hospital entrance as choirs sang Christmas carols, the music and emotion were so overwhelming. And the music continued with the most wonderful moment when a brass band played carols in the neuro unit. The tree in the photo is the one outside Southampton hospital, despite the very difficult circumstances, the staff attempted to create Christmas sparkles. 

As I write now, Mr S has been discharged. I felt the discharge was premature and would have preferred him to get the treatment he needed in a rehab unit, but there were no beds available. Our nhs is amazing and the care we received outstanding, but it desperately needs investment. Its lovely to have Mr S home and to be able to sit with him, he remains resting in bed, but there is a lot of caring and many, many further scares so far. The specialist equipment he needed came after Christmas and he is very wobbly standing and walking, he needs someone supporting him at all times. I am living from day to day and not making any plans for the future. My parents still remain with us and for the foreseeable future to support me and the children. 

Christmas was simply a time to appreciate family and cherish the day together which we had prayed and dreamed of only two weeks earlier. An incident such as the one we experienced showed the truly important things in life, love, care and family and friendships. One of my favourite quotes for Christmas resonates even more

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

After last week’s attempt to see the Christmas tree lights ended up in an unexpected visit to A&E for my son, we made a new date and yesterday, we had the most special mum and son day exploring the lights. And then to continue the festive theme, our little family of four visited a local National Trust property today where as well as doing a woodland walk around their grounds, we visited the house which has been beautifully decorated for Christmas. It’s unlike me to go in early for Christmas but with Mr S having surgery on the 12th of December and needing time to rest and recuperate, if we want to do some festive family events we need to do them early.

Saturday was a beautiful winter’s day, bright blue skies but with a definite chill in the air. I ran my home parkrun and with the views and sunshine on my face, it certainly gave me a real sense of peace in another busy week. We headed over to the Christmas lights in the afternoon, again on the bus as it’s so much easier and the journey is often cited as one of the most picturesque journeys in the UK. Whilst it was Black Friday weekend, we had ordered the presents we were after on Friday night, so we didn’t do much shopping, just pottering around the Christmas market before dusk fell and we could explore the lights. Part of the occasion is to have a special festive refreshment, previously it’s been freshly baked pizza, crepes and churros but tonight we went to a hut designed as a hot chocolate emporium. Quite simply it was the best hot chocolate I’ve ever had. You choose, milk or white chocolate, a syrup and then it came with all the trimmings, cream, sprinkles, marshmallows, a gingerbread man and a candy cane. We paid an extra £3 to get the mug with twinkling lights too, it just felt oh so festive. I went for white chocolate and butterscotch and it was perfect, the best accessory for walking through the illuminated gardens. The gardens are really Christmassy, along with all the different lights, there is a skating rink and an Alpine hideaway. The lights are so impressive, the trees are huge and there were lots of nice new touches this year, a tunnel of lights, the waterfall now featuring some polar bears too, projections onto nearby buildings, and some new displays. It was busy but it added to the atmosphere, and you could easily get to all the lights. It was also friendly and relaxed with people taking each other’s group photos, everyone simply delighted to be in such a magical space. My son and I both really enjoyed it and it felt special that even as a teenager he wanted to be with me to see the lights.

Today, we hadn’t really planned our visit to the National Trust property, we were looking for somewhere different to go and walk and remembered we had a free entry pass needing to be used up. I knew of their special Christmas decorations in the house but also knew it would be popular and we might not get a ticket as they only allow so many people in for a timed slot. However the weather was drizzly and grey and when we get there early, it was quieter than normal and we managed to secure a time only 15 minutes away, perfectly timed for a quick look around the shop! The house is always beautiful, but the decorations took it to another magical level. Each room and area had been decorated exquisitely. The trees reflect each room, the library was so cosy lit by candlelight, the ladies salon sparkled and the dining room’s tree complemented the beautiful greenery arch over the table. However, it was the other decorations which were so memorable, the beautiful fireplace, the moon display, the table delightfully set with a Nutcracker theme and a stunning paper display. The paper decoration was a cube around 1.5 metres high, with each side showing a scene cut from paper and lit. It really was breath-taking and I was so pleased we were able to tour the house today. We followed it up with a damp walk around the woods and gardens to blow the cobwebs before we came home and settled into a cosy afternoon in.

This was the weekend I really needed, there’s lots going on and our two festive visits felt like a much needed escape to a sparkly, twinkly world. The festive treats continue next weekend, with our town’s Christmas market which is a genuine highlight of the year and then when the boys go to football on Sunday, my daughter and I are heading off to Southampton for our annual Christmas shopping trip. I’m pretty organised this year, the children want a few big presents which we have already ordered thanks to looking out for offers. So far on my shopping list it’s Christmas pyjamas and a few decorations, I’ve no doubt on my daughter’s list there’ll be nails, eye lashes and a few clothes totally unsuitable for the winter weather! However, there will definitely be a special lunch with a few mocktails. What’s not to love?

Its another fortnightly catch up, the two weeks after half term which has included Mr S’ birthday, Halloween, our 25th anniversary of being a couple, Bonfire night (although the storm meant most displays were postponed or cancelled) and lots of football for my boys. The most significant event of this fortnight, is one I don’t feel comfortable writing about, but it has made me reflect on the beauty and fragility of life and how important it is to be there for each other.

Mr S birthday was a quiet celebration and we went out for a lovely family meal at a carvery. I never buy Mr S a traditional birthday cake, it is always his favourite, Christmas cake and this year, I sourced the one which keeps on coming top in best taste tests from Aldi. I do love a little mooch around Aldi and whilst I did get the cake, which was delicious and well worthy of its awards, I also picked up lots of lovely goodies too, I’m particularly looking forward to the blonde chocolate elves.

I am feeling pretty well organised for Christmas this year. I’ve been buying presents and wrapping them as I go along. I even managed to find the Christmas flavoured crisps this week for Mr S, although I would not recommend the Christmas pudding flavour, I only tasted one and it was enough! Last year, I experienced my first Christmas since returning to work full time and know this year, I want to make sure that I do as much preparation as I can early so I can relax and enjoy December and its special events. Mr S played his part this week, finding and ordering some presents and booking the coveted Tesco Christmas delivery. I am planning the Christmas menu, although was disappointed by this year’s Good Food Vegetarian Christmas magazine. However, as I have many past editions, I buy it every year, I am sure I can find a special main course for Christmas dinner. My personalised Christmas cards arrived this week and they are amazing, I am so impressed and absolutely delighted with the design. I can’t wait to write and send them out. I am making a real effort to support small businesses this year and Instagram has been a wonderful source of ideas and links. This morning, I also popped into the best local Christmas decoration shop situated in a great garden centre. It is next to a parkrun and as I’m going to be running locally probably until after Christmas, I took the opportunity for a little tourism. I wanted a flat parkrun that my daughter would enjoy, our home run is so tough it can be daunting. We both ran well and loved our little visit to the Christmas shop, it is the most magical shop, with so many different themed rooms. We then popped over to Waitrose for nibbles for lunch and to sustain GCSE mock exam revision!

This week, my new bureau arrived. When we moved nearly 20 years ago, I found an old bureau in a second hand shop. It has served me very well and I have renovated it too, but sadly after 20 years daily use, it needed to be replaced. Buy a new bureau was one of my #23for23 and this year, I have spent the year hunting online and in charity furniture depots, retro warehouses etc.. to find a new bureau with no success. Its become a bit of a family mission too, and last week Mr S sent me some photos of a bureau he had seen in the window of a local charity shop in excellent condition. Initially I didn’t think it was the style I was looking for but at the price, £25 it would at least be an interim. However, I have totally fallen in love with its 1970s style and it is perfect, I am so pleased to have my new bureau. It also shows how rewarding on so many different levels it is to buy second hand. I have had a bit of a Vinted blitz this week and have a beautiful party skirt from Coast (£4), and everyday skirts from Laura Ashley and White Stuff (£6 each) due to arrive next week.

Today is Armistice day, I wore my poppy to parkrun and as we drove home we by chance, found ourselves driving near the village where my Gramps had served with the RAF. The autumn colours were stunning, bright blue skies and a very poignant place to be at 11am to remember all who served in war. This afternoon, I needed to pop into town briefly but did take the time to walk along the seafront and up to the war memorial. The big parade is tomorrow afternoon but I found it peaceful to visit it today. The remembrance crosses each bearing the name of a serviceman from the memorial had been planted by school children yesterday in the traditional school’s service and the child made wreaths on the memorial were simple and moving.

Every autumn, I play a little game on how long I can keep wearing my summer wardrobe. With the random weather we have been having, I have packed my summer dresses away one weekend only to have to get them out the next!

This past week we had some terrible weather during the week, only to be blessed with a stunning weekend. Saturday morning at parkrun was beautiful, near perfect running conditions and then a relaxed parkfaff outside on the café terrace, with warm sunshine on our faces. There was also just a super friendly atmosphere, some lovely visitors and our community whom all made a joyful morning. Sunday was another mild day and we enjoyed a long family walk, with the bonus of warm pasties at the midway point. I nicknamed it our berry and nuts walk, because as we walked through the countryside, nature’s signs of autumn were all there to see. As we approach autumn, I am also back to Saturday night is cooking night, this week our recipe was a delicious savoury crumble. It was also my first homemade soup of the season for Saturday lunch, fresh soup and bread from our local bakery is the best lunch.

At this time of year, the start of a new academic year, my weekdays are very work focused, so I do really appreciate my weekends. I’m relishing being outside and every evening have been taking a walk around the block for 30 minutes, it helps to reflect on the day and to relax ready for the evening (and also to calm after the stress of asking my Year 11 daughter to do just a bit of schoolwork) On Monday evening, I did watch the live Chanel presentation from the V&A with Justine Picardie as an introduction to their exhibition. I am counting down the days to our trip in half term. I do like having something to look forward to. On Sunday we were also doing some planning for our Med cruise next summer, I’m very excited for the trips we have booked so far, Segways in Marseille and a Gaudi tour to Park Güell and Sagrada Familia. I am the sort of person who will research and learn all about Gaudi in the preceding weeks to really embrace the visit. The children and Mr S are off to a water park on the same day and I am secretly delighted to be a visiting it alone (albeit in a guided party)

Next week is a quiet week, the boys have a couple of football matches, so some quiet time for me, which is always appreciated.

After last week’s dull but essential holiday activities it was time for some fun. The weather continued to be really poor but we made the most of it and adapted our days.

Sunday was carnival day but sadly also very wet and windy. We were prepared for the parade to be cancelled but then there was a sudden break in the weather and it was on. It was a much better parade than last year with lots more floats. My favourite part of carnival is simply catching up with everyone and there were so many people I got to see whom I haven’t seen for ages. A very satisfying afternoon.

On Monday, we visited the fashion museum which I’ve written a separate entry on and it has definitely inspired me. I’ve signed up to a V&A webinar and have been reading articles and books on fashion and style.

Tuesday was our 20th wedding anniversary, again the weather was mixed so rather than a lazy day on the beach, we walked along the next stage of the coastal path we’ve been walking this summer. This was more fun than it may seem, we were on a busy, vibrant part of the path and it was great to people watch. We also stopped in town for lunch where the children managed to take a photo of the two of us just sitting next to each other, a quiet celebration of our anniversary.

Wednesday was again horrendous weather. As I knew I needed to spend a day at work this summer, and had to take my son to football training in the afternoon I combined the two. My thinking was better to work on a miserable day than a lovely day later in the holidays. My son came into help me .. help is quite a loose term! He did paint my blackboard but then was keen to explore the school and my resources. I was quite exhausted by the end of my trip. I did wonder if the football training would be on because of the weather but it was and we went along to a very soggy session. I had promised fireworks and chips on Wednesday night, but again it looked unlikely due to the weather and I was looking forward to a quiet night in after a very busy day. However the weather cleared again and we headed down to town for the fireworks. We had an amazing view and they were spectacular. I was choked up when the announcer spoke about the little girl for whom the fireworks were in memory of, the line I hope these look good from heaven made me very emotional.

Thursday and Friday were spent packing and prepping for holidays. I am organised and prepared by nature, but spend a lot of these pre holiday days reassuring Mr S, he does find these days quite stressful when everything really is under control.

Finally, Saturday was parkrun day and one of the wettest ever! I only volunteered as I was taking my son to football and needed to be home quickly. In addition to a very wet parkrun, the football was so wet too. We came home damp and cold so went for an early night before our holiday on Sunday.

We are all excited for our holiday, we have a night in Stoke and then a week in North Wales before Blackpool for a second week. We have lots booked and planned, it’s time to make happy memories.

This week saw the start of the school summer holidays. I have been so looking forward to the holiday but in reality this was a pretty dull week prior to my birthday. It was a week to catch up on lots and do the essential life admin, there have been visits to the doctor, dentist and hospital for routine appointments, a couple of football training sessions which mean a 40 mile round trip and holiday nails and treatments. The weather was also pretty poor, grey and drizzly so not the most inspiring way to start the holiday. I was feeling a little despondent with my week but then listened to a teacher podcast and it seemed my week was pretty normal for most teachers.

The highlight of the week was my birthday, as I celebrated my 50th. I’m not someone who gets stressed about my age, I’m happy who I am and how I am, and there’s no desire to try and be a younger me. I did feel a pressure from some parties to do something for my birthday when I was really quite comfortable with a quiet day with loved ones. I am the organiser and planner in our family and really did not want the stress to do this for my own celebration so left all the planning to my husband. I appreciated my day, it was me and who I am today. We started with breakfast at my favourite cafe in town and it was dry and warm to be able to sit outside in their colourful courtyard. It was here I was presented with my present, a certificate of ownership of a personalised plaque on the pier. Of course, our first stop after breakfast was to find my plaque on the pier. It is in a lovely spot and I am so made up with my gift. My husband did tease me that he knew I would question the u instead of you, but did explain there was a character limit and he couldn’t write the full word. I am so happy with my gift, I have been saying that I have been immortalised on our town’s pier. I love the thought of my grandchildren finding my plaque in the years to come, or friends passing and seeing it and thinking of happy times together. After our visit to the pier, we then walked the length of the beach, the sun on our faces and just chatting together ‘en famille.’ After a lovely al fresco lunch, I sat in the garden whilst friends and neighbours popped around, flowers were delivered and many messages exchanged. My neighbours bought me a rose in my name so Mr S planted this for me in our garden. As he did this, I also found the time to finish my book in the sunshine, these simple pleasures made my day. In all of this we also had a visit from Dyno Rod as we had discovered a significant leak the day before, happily it was easily fixed. The day finished with a Chinese dinner.

As it is now carnival week, there was a party feel at our parkrun on Saturday morning and I dressed up. I did keep my birthday quiet as I don’t like the fuss but had such a lovely morning with the carnival atmosphere and community fun.

Following our week of life admin, our future weeks look so much more exciting and fun, now we just need the weather to improve.